A lot of my posts are centred around Neurodivergence and what life is like living as a late-diagnosed parent of Neurodivergent children. Reading back through my older posts, I realised how intense this can come across, so today’s post is one that focusses on things (other than my children, boyfriend and family) that make me happy.
I cannot stress enough that in life, we need an outlet from the day to day hustle and bustle of being an adult. It is not enough to simply exist- which is a feeling I know a lot of people out there (me included at times) feel like they’re doing. The time old cliché of ‘you only get one life, live it’ is something that’s fairly easy to dismiss as a young person. You genuinely believe you have all the time in the world, and you cannot, in fact, wait to get older so you can be afforded the luxury of doing whatever you want.
Think back to that time in your life where you were able to feel that way. What dreams did you have? What had you planned to be when you grew up? What ‘things’ couldn’t you wait to do as an adult?
Now take a moment to look at your life now. If you’re anything like me, the reality is so far from those childhood dreams that you wince a little and for once are thankful you don’t have to come face to face with the childhood version of you to see the utter disdain and disappointment on their face!
Ok, that was a little depressing! Moving on…
All that being said, there are so many other things (as mentioned in the first paragraph) that make me truly happy. Am I where I thought I’d be at almost 40? Absolutely not. Do I mind? No. I can now say that with a degree of certainty. Whilst a more stable financial and health situation would be lovely, I still consider myself extremely lucky.
I have three incredible children. They’re intelligent, funny, kind and loving (most of the time), and they have shown me beyond all reason what true love is. I have a boyfriend that saved me. He met me at one of the lowest points in my life and began by simply being my friend. He got to know me, the real me, first. No rushing, nothing fancy, no expectation. That was exactly what I needed.
There are many things I can look around and be thankful for, but today I’d like to share with you things that make me feel happy.
Music
Better than any ‘happy’ pill!
Music has always been a lifeline for me. Ever since I was little, I would hyperfixate on songs and listen to them on repeat until I was sick of them. I would need to feel the music as loudly as I could manage to really get lost in it. It sounds cheesy, but it’s true. I would get immensely frustrated if I wasn’t able to do that, or if my music listening session was interrupted.
I love to completely immerse myself in my favourite music. I love to sing. I love to watch live music, and I love to stand in the middle of the dancefloor in a nightclub and just take it all in. Music, I truly believe, has saved my life on more than one occasion.
Baking
Baking has been a hobby of mine since I took Home Economics at school. I developed a real love of baking and making sweet treats, and I remember my little brother used to wait by the front door with his spoon on the days he knew I’d been cooking at school!
One of the things I wanted to be was a pastry chef, sadly circumstances meant I was unable to pursue that at the time, and then life got in the way! So, I taught myself and the pictures above are a few of my favourite bakes over the years.
Photography
I have loved photography for as long as I can remember. From way back in the day when I used my first disposable camera, to my very first film camera, to my first DSLR- I have loved capturing moments. The photos I take, I cherish. They’re my memories. I prefer capturing portraiture- that’s my favourite kind of photography, but if I use the rule that if it makes my eyes excited, I try to capture what they can see.
Crafting
I love to be creative in as many ways as possible- it really does make me happy. I was lucky enough that my boyfriend bought me a Cricut machine for Christmas last year. I have had so much fun getting to grips with how to use it. It’s just been a shame that I haven’t had nearly enough time to use it as much as I’d like.
These are the things I repeatedly gravitate towards throughout my life as ways of staying grounded and feeling like myself. As a parent, that can be such a difficult thing to feel. You become lost in being a parent, and once lost, it is so hard to find your way back to being a person too.
It’s my hope that through this blog, and through finally finding my tribe of people, I can find my way again and finally live the life I’ve only thus far been able to dream of living. The biggest thing I need to teach myself is that it’s ok to be happy.
Laura x
